We're All Just People

Race, racism, color, sexual orientation, anything to differentiate people seems to be so rampant in the news right now.  We’ve all heard about Paula Deen, Trayvon Martin, and George Zimmerman, to name a few.  Everyone seems to have an opinion, and most folks seem more than happy to shout theirs from the rooftops, or their blogs, or their facebook walls.  I’m not going to share my opinion on any of these issues with you.  There are more than enough forums for argument without me creating yet another one.  But I am going to talk about people.

I was fortunate enough to be raised by parents who didn’t teach us to look at people as black, white, Hispanic, or Asian, but to look at them as people.  Human beings, with unique personalities, likes, dislikes, and ideas.  We were taught to like and dislike people based on the person and how they behaved and lived.

I took this for granted as a child and teenager.  It just didn’t really occur to me that people didn’t take that approach.  It wasn’t until I was older that I realized how truly prejudiced some people are, or how so many people are so very much aware of race and differences, not thinking of someone as a person, but as a label.  I find myself alternating between being angry with the labelers for being so stuck on labels, and pitying them for some of the great friendships that they will probably never have.

I can’t help but wonder how far some people might be willing to take labels.  My skin is pale, so I’m considered white, but do I need to explain my ancestry too?  Am I to become Danielle, the heterosexual, pale skinned woman with French, Native American (Cherokee and Apache, if you need specifics), Italian, and Greek ancestry?  Should I further go on to explain (just to keep my label really accurate) that while my last name sounds somewhat German, I have no German ancestry that I’m aware of, and that I merely took my husband’s last name when we married?  I know that sounds ridiculous, but I don’t see how it’s much worse than deciding that we can or can’t be friends based on the color of my skin or any other label.  Isn’t it easier for me to be just Danielle?  Then you can learn that I love animals, am chronically late, somewhat pigheaded, and a little obsessed with feeding people, and then like or dislike me for those and the thousands of other things that make me me. 

On the other end of the spectrum, you come across things like this post that I read a while back.  I encourage you to check it out.  It’s worth the click and the read.  In it, Mare talks about the colors in her life, not as black and white, but as paint colors that best match the person’s skin tone.  There’s a link to a color wheel where you can match up yourself or other people using pictures.  I haven’t taken the time to do it yet, but it has tempted me to tell people that I’m cream or vellum (my makeup colors depending on the season) if they must have a color label for me.  Mare matches up quite a few family members, and it’s interesting to see the different shades and variations, even within the same family.  And some of the color names are great; some people end up being colors like China Moon or Lilac.  It’s a beautiful sentiment, and makes me think that her life must be very full for having so many people of various colors in it. 

I think about the colors in my life, and I realize that my life is full of different and colorful people once I actually sit back and think about the labels that they would be given.  There’s Hailie, my Chinese friend, who I always think of as my only much younger friend, so full of energy, there’s Jocelyn my black friend, who I always think of as a very outgoing and truly kind person who seems to have it all together, there’s Sarah my white, lesbian friend, who I always think of as my Facebook friend who posts great animal pictures and is a plethora of lawn care/home maintenance information, there’s Esther my friend from Spain, who I always think of as my older, wiser friend who’s a mix of friend and older sister, there’s Crystal, my white (though by very different ancestry than me) friend, who I think of as the diplomat, my best friend, cohort, etc.    

I wasn’t denied any of these friendships because of labels.  Once again, I alternate between pity for the people who will never be friends with these people because of labels, and anger at them for callously dismissing some truly wonderful people. 

So I say again, we’re all just people.  We all have hopes, dreams, fears, insecurities, and unique personalities that make us who we are.  We don’t need labels for that. 

Johnny & June

We are foster parents again.  This time we are temporarily housing two eight week old hound puppies.  The semi-local no kill shelter was contacted by a kill shelter in a neighboring county about taking in 34 puppies who were on death row, and sent out a plea for foster homes.

The no kill shelter was able to take all 34 puppies, but only if they could find foster homes for two weeks for all of them.  They were out of room themselves, and don’t typically keep puppies that haven’t been through all of their vaccines in the shelter. 

This is our first time fostering puppies.  We typically prefer older dogs or cats, but looking at the puppies’ sweet little faces and knowing that stepping up was literally the difference between whether they would live or die made us take the leap into fostering puppies.  We reasoned that it’s only a two week commitment.  Two weeks of something new and different for us really isn’t much compared to saving their lives. 

All 34 puppies arrived at the no kill shelter at 3:00 on Tuesday afternoon, and were all parceled out to their various foster homes by 7:30 that evening.  Some brave souls took groups of four puppies. 

Johnny and June weren’t named at the shelter.  They were the last two hound puppies in a carrier, so were sent with me for convenience sake as we hadn’t spoken up for specific puppies, just agreed to take two.  The foster coordinator told me we could name them.  It’s about a 45 minute drive home from the shelter, and the only time they stopped crying in the car was when country music was playing, especially anything old school.  At that point I had to name them Johnny and June! 

Johnny and June have to remain separated from Emma, and cannot go outside at all due to their age, coming from the first shelter, and vaccine status.  We have the puppy crate in the added on room because that’s the best place to keep anyone separated from the other fur kids.  It has changed up our routine a little bit, but so far it hasn’t been terrible.  It is more work having them around, but it seems to be worth it. 

Caring for them seems to mostly consist of constantly changing out the newspaper and cleaning their crate.  It also appears that they’re going to need near daily baths.  They are very loud when they want attention, but they play with each other and they sleep a lot.  They’re beginning to discover toys, which is fun to watch, and they seem to be developing their own little personalities.  June is feistier and wants to play and chew on things.  Johnny is cuddlier and wants to be held and petted. 

I’ve been told that they will likely end up on the northern transport program since hounds are usually adopted very quickly that way.  It’s just nice to be a very small part of that, and to know that soon they’re going to have their forever home(s).  

Another Rainy Day

We are getting drenched here in our little piece of the world.  It has been raining off and on (more on than off) since Thursday night, and really picked up yesterday.  Rain is definitely not one of my favorite things.  I prefer sunny skies with puffy white clouds. However, I am working on keeping a more positive outlook, so I’ve tried to come up with some things that I do like about rainy days.  I managed to think of five, so here they are:

1.  I don’t have to water the garden.  Mother Nature is taking care of that for me today, so no need to drag out the hose and watering can.  That’s one thing off of my to do list for today.  I’m also told that lettuce likes the cooler, rainy weather.  I’m hoping that my pots of lettuce will begin to thrive since we’ve had so much rain. 

2.  My husband enjoys overcast days, and really likes the rain, so he has been very happy with the weather

lately. 

3.  The cats are always incredibly snuggly when it’s rainy.  There’s nothing quite like cuddling up with a purring cat (or four) on a rainy night.

4.  Soup!  Rainy days are perfect for homemade soup.  Tonight it’s chicken noodle soup from the slow cooker. 

5.  Emma looks really cute walking around in her Thundershirt, and it seems to make a huge difference for her to wear it. 

So what about you?  Do you like or dislike the rain?  Are there things you like about rainy days?

Last Week’s CSA Box

Our CSA pick-ups began last week.  I love it so far!  Last week’s box was filled with various lettuces and greens, including tat soi, mustard greens, and several others.  We also had a nice bunch of green onions. 

Salads featured heavily on our menu last week!  We’ve found that chopping all of the greens into small pieces makes for a wonderful salad with great flavor and texture.  I love adding the mustard greens to salad for a peppery flavor.  I also sautéed some of the greens in olive oil for a delicious side dish.  I didn’t measure anything, but here’s the basic recipe: 

About five or six cups of washed, shredded greens (mustard, Swiss chard, tat soi, etc)

Olive Oil (enough to barely cover the bottom of the pan)

2 – 3 chopped green onions

Fresh garlic, pressed or chopped (3 – 6 cloves; I used 6 because we love garlic)

Salt & Pepper to taste

Heat olive oil in a large pan over medium heat.  Add garlic, stir for about a minute, then add everything else and sauté for about 10 minutes. 

Enjoy!

The half share seems very generous so far.  It’s advertised as being enough for two to three people per week, but seems to be a little more than that.  We ate a lot of salad, had the greens, and gave some away to my parents (they had enough for my mom to give one of her co-workers a salad) and Nick’s grandparents.  Nick took the last of it to work last night to share with his co-workers. 

I’m hoping it will last, but we noticed that we ate a lot more vegetables last week.  There’s just something about having a whole box of organic vegetables that is making us very conscientious of using them up.  We planned meals around vegetables, which is a somewhat new experience for us.  We were also mindful of giving away what we couldn’t use, so as not to waste anything.  That was one of our concerns when we signed up for the CSA, but I’m happy to say that everything from our first box was consumed and enjoyed.  

I Am Back

Hello, there.  I’m back.  How are you?

Things have been busy here in the land of Sweet Tea.  As I said in my last post, there were some things going on that were simply taking every bit of my energy and focus.  Things have settled down some now.  Actually, they’ve been somewhat settled for a while now. 

I’ve just been struggling with how to come back to blogging; what to tell you, how much to share, etc.  You see, to tell you the whole story will involve getting really personal for me, more than I have before.  I wasn’t sure about doing that.  I really thought about posting something along the lines of “had a health scare, it’s mostly okay now, so glad to be back”.  And that is the truth, of sorts.  It’s just not the complete truth.

You see, the complete truth has been building for over a decade.  I just didn’t know it.  So, after a very long internal struggle, I have decided to tell you the whole, complete story.  I wish someone else had some time over the past twelve years or so, because I might not be writing this if I knew then what I know now.

I apologize in advance if some of what I’m sharing crosses the line for any of you.  Like I said, I really struggled with this post (I’ve been drafting it in my head for weeks now), but I feel that the need to know outweighs the need to keep it clean and pretty. 

I was diagnosed with hepatic adenomas last month.  For those of you who are as blissfully ignorant as I was two months ago, they are benign liver tumors.  I have nine of them.  You can read more about them here or here if you’re so inclined.  A Google search will also yield some interesting reading.   I’m sure at this point, you’re saying, “Oh, they’re benign, what’s the big deal?” 

There are a lot of things that make them a big deal, so here goes:

First and foremost (and the part that makes me really angry, and feel like I need to share my experience) is the fact that they were almost certainly caused by years of taking oral contraceptives (birth control pills) and I was NEVER informed that this was a risk. 

I began taking birth control pills right around my 18^th birthday.  I wasn’t using them for birth control at that time.  During the ten plus years I took them, they were for birth control for roughly two and a half years.  I initially went on them to control very heavy menstrual bleeding, and they worked reasonably well.  I would be given a prescription that would work for a while, and then the bleeding would get really bad again and they’d change my prescription, usually to a higher dose of estrogen. 

I saw four different gynecologists during this time, and they all took a similar approach.  None of them looked into the cause of the bleeding much, or suggested any alternative remedies.  I read all of the inserts that came with the pills and mentioned the risks: increased risk of breast cancer, blood clots, stroke, etc, and talked about these risks being increased for women who smoked, had high blood pressure, or were over 35.  I didn’t have any of those risk factors:  I’m a non-smoker, I don’t have a family history of breast cancer, and my blood pressure tends to run a little low.  Even an imminent needle stick doesn’t get me more than a point or two over what they tell me is ideal.  I thought things were good.  I kept up with my yearly appointments, I read all of the inserts that came with the medications, and the doctors kept prescribing them. 

Then things changed; the bleeding became worse than it had ever been earlier this year, to the point that I had to leave work a few times because of it.  I got an appointment with the gynecologist who finally decided to do an ultrasound.  At that time it was determined that the high estrogen content in the pills (they had continually upped the dosage over the years) was actually contributing to the problem, and I was put on a totally different group of hormones.  Once again, I thought everything was good.

I had been to my regular doctor in the midst of all of this for a lingering cough, and I mentioned to him about the bleeding, and that I had an appointment set up with the gynecologist.  He said that if the gynecologist didn’t do blood work he wanted me to come back to his office to have some done to check for anemia, thyroid issues, etc. 

The gynecologist never mentioned blood work, just sent me on my way with a new prescription, so I went back to the family doctor for a blood draw.  I didn’t think much about it after they drew the blood.  My numbers have always been good.  I once had mildly elevated liver enzymes, but the doctor I was seeing at the time attributed that to my being heavy and having had my gallbladder removed. 

So I was a little surprised when my doctor’s office called and said that I had elevated enzymes, and that they wanted to send me for an abdominal ultrasound. 

I went for the ultrasound and was told there was something there that they needed a clearer picture of, so was then sent for a CT Scan.  The CT Scan revealed that there was definitely something there, but they still couldn’t tell what.  The next step was an MRI.  The MRI revealed nine masses of some sort, but they still couldn’t tell what.

I was then scheduled for a liver biopsy.  I had to wait a little over a week for the biopsy, and then another week for the results, and I can tell you that was not a fun time at all.  There are so many possibilities and what-ifs that start to swirl around in your head. 

I have been seeing an acupuncturist for two years now for allergy problems.  It has helped a lot.  I used to have about five or six sinus infections a year and now am down to maybe one or two per year.  I told her about everything that was going on during all of the testing.  She was actually the first medical professional to make the connection between the liver issues and the hormonal issues.

After talking with her I stopped taking the hormones three days after the biopsy.  Five days later the doctor’s office called with the results and told me to stop taking the hormones. 

My husband and I met with the doctor and we’re currently taking a wait and see approach.  Hepatic adenomas are relatively rare, and from what the doctor says and from what I’ve read there isn’t a specific, agreed upon course of treatment.  They typically recommend surgical removal if they’re causing pain or if they’re bigger than 5 centimeters.  The biggest risk is that they rupture and cause internal bleeding. 

Mine aren’t causing me pain, but the largest one is 5.6 centimeters, the second one is 5 centimeters.  And I really, really don’t want to have surgery.  The surgery is major, the recovery is long, and at this point I have very little faith and confidence in the medical profession.  I can’t help wondering what issues the surgery may create ten years down the road. 

There are mixed results as to what discontinuing the hormones does for them, but there’s at least a chance they will shrink.  So that is what we’re hoping for.  I will go back for another MRI in October to see what is going on with them. 

In the meantime I have stopped taking the hormones, have stopped eating tofu, and am trying to cut out all soy products.  (I had no idea how many food products have soy!  But that’s another post for another time.)  I am also trying to lose weight.  I need to lose weight anyway, and if I do end up having abdominal surgery I am sure I will be better off not carrying a lot of excess weight in that area. 

My doctor has told me to mostly use common sense: no contact sports or anything like that, which is a non-issue for me.  I also have to go get checked out if there’s any trauma to my right side (car accident, etc).  I can’t take any blood thinners, and need to eliminate, or limit as much as possible anything that puts a strain on my liver.  I finally kicked my soda habit (which took off twenty pounds), and no longer have the occasional drink. 

I hate having this hanging over me, but it’s a lot better than what was going through my head while waiting for the biopsy and results.  It has also made me a lot more concerned with getting myself as healthy as possible and making better choices, which has to be a good thing regardless of what happens with the adenomas.  So in the meantime, I will continue to educate myself as much as possible and hope for some shrinkage in October.

So how are all of you?  I hope things have been well.  I’m really looking forward to catching back up on everyone’s blogs. 

Taking A Break

I will not be participating in the A to Z Challenge this year after
all.  There are some things going on in my life right now that are
taking all of my energy and focus, and may continue to do so for a
while.

I just don't have anything extra to give to writing right now.  Every
time lately that I have tried nothing comes, and I just feel
overwhelmed.

I hope to be back to writing and reading your blogs sooner rather than
later, and I wish you all the best until then.

Saving With Store Brands

I came across this article today about saving money on groceries by purchasing store brands.  According to the article, switching from name brands to store brands can save you about 25 percent.  The article does go on to state that not all store brands taste the same as name brands, and that the nutrition content may be different.

Personally, I believe that buying store brands only saves money if the store brand is something you will actually use.  Here are some tips I’ve picked up along my quest to reduce our grocery budget:

- Store brand ingredients (flour, sugar, salt, spices, etc) seem to be more similar to name brands.  We’ve never noticed a difference in using these store brand ingredients instead of name brands in cooking and baking.

- Store brand prepared foods seem to taste very different than their name brand counterparts.  We notice the biggest difference in things like pasta sauce and canned soup.  It doesn’t save money to buy “cheaper” jars of pasta sauce we’re never going to eat.  We are better off to wait for sales on the brands we like. 

- Vegetables seem to be equally as good when purchased as a store brand instead of a name brand.  We buy a lot of frozen spinach and canned beans, usually store brands, and have never noticed a difference.  This is especially true if they’re going in a casserole, soup, or chili. 

- If you have skin allergies or sensitive skin laundry detergent is not something to try to save money on by experimenting with different brands!  I have very sensitive skin and most laundry detergents turn me into a miserably itchy walking rash, sometimes leading to a doctor’s visit for a steroid shot.  In addition to making me miserable, that costs a lot more money in the long run.  I have learned to just stick with the three brands of laundry detergent that I know won’t trigger a bad reaction.  I try to save money by stocking up on them when they’re on sale, not by buying “cheaper” alternatives. 

- Once in a while some grocery stores will run a “buy theirs try ours free” special where you receive the store brand version of certain items free when you buy the name brand.  This is an excellent, risk free, opportunity to try the store brand and determine what you like and don’t like.  You can find out about promotions like this by signing up for the store’s emails. 

- Don’t underestimate the value of shopping sales and using coupons.  We’re fortunate enough to live close to several different grocery stores, so I always check the sale ads to see who has what on sale before we go shopping and only get what is the best deal at each store.  Many times the sale price on a name brand is cheaper than the store brand.  Name brands also have coupons sometimes, which just add to the savings.  Watch for in-store promotions where buying a certain number of items from the same brand will take money off of your total bill.  I love to use this when I can match coupons to the items that are on sale.  They usually work out to be anywhere from about 75 percent off to free. 

I also try to stock up on things we use a lot when they’re on a really good sale.  Most grocery stores seem to have about a six week sale cycle, so I try to buy about six week’s worth of items we use a lot of while they’re on sale instead of paying full price for them later on. 

Shopping this way has resulted in a few amazingly cheap shopping trips.  My best to date has been $125.00 worth of groceries for $25.00.  I wish I could tell you this happens every week, but it doesn’t.  Shopping this way on an average grocery trip usually saves us between 40 and 60 percent, which is still good enough to make me really happy.