A Long Catch-Up Post

 I know it wasn’t a very realistic hope, but I was kind of hoping that things would be a little more normal by the time I posted again.  Nope.  Not even close.  It seemed like North Carolina started off fairly strong, compared to neighboring states, in taking COVID precautions.  But now, despite all of the pleas from the experts, we seem to be on a crash course to disaster.  I don’t know of anyone now who hasn’t had a close friend, family member, or co-worker have COVID.  But enough about COVID.

Duke

We painted and re-did the floor in our kitchen in October.  We postponed our annual Folly Beach trip to next year, but still took the week off of work. We both have a lot of paid time off accumulated, so we decided to take the week and do the kitchen project.  

And that’s probably the last house project we’ll do for quite a while!  It took much longer, and was much harder than we expected.  You know how people complain that romantic comedies paint an unrealistic picture of relationships?  Well, I think that’s nothing compared to the lies Lowe’s and Home Depot are selling in their commercials.  The couples in those always look so happy during their projects.  They have on nice clean clothes and are smiling at each other.   There’s none of the covered in sawdust and paint and seriously re-thinking being married to someone who wants to blast whiney 80s music, or doesn’t know the name of every single tool.  Anyway, that’s my take on who sets couples up for unrealistic expectations.  

Fortunately, both of us, and our marriage, survived the kitchen project.  Here’s a progress picture.  I haven’t taken a finished picture yet because I only think about it once I’ve started cooking, and I’m so messy, I don’t want to take a picture of that.  You can at least see the colors.  Almost everything was a very ugly beige before.  

Painting in progress.

I’m still crocheting mask adapters/extenders.  There was a lull in people asking for them for a while, but people have started asking for them again, so I’ve been making and mailing them.  If you need one, let me know in the comments.  

Mask Adapters

We had a health scare with Tara in October.  It turns out that she has bladder crystals and has to be on a special diet.  She had to have an ultrasound to look for crystals (which the vet suspected) or stones, and to rule out any kind of mass.  Due to COVID, the vet’s office isn’t allowing people into the office, so we had to wait in the parking lot when Tara had her ultrasound.  One of the vet techs came out as soon as it was finished and told us, unofficially, that there were no masses, but the vet would be out later to tell us that officially and talk to us.  I wanted to hug her!  Every other time we’ve had a pet have an ultrasound, the news has been devastating, so we were pretty nervous.  I thought it was so sweet of her to come out and tell us the good news right away.

Tara has to be on a special diet, and we’re limiting her stress.  She’s a very timid cat, and is afraid of almost everything, so limiting her stress isn’t the easiest thing.  It has taken a lot of trial and error, but we seem to have figured out the food situation for her.  There are three different kinds she likes, for a few days at a time, so we have small bowls of all three brands of dry food out for her, and we alternate the brand of wet food every day or two.  Tara is also currently living in our bedroom, away from the other cats.  She seems to have no desire to leave!  Howard goes in and hangs out with her (and eats the special food he’s not exactly supposed to have) every day.  For now, it seems to be working.  We’re tossing around ideas for later on, but for the moment, she’s happy in the bedroom.

Doesn't she look happy?

We didn’t host Thanksgiving this year.  I was very disappointed about that, but I believe we made the right choice.  We did still get to drop off the meal for the hospice house, though.  I wasn’t sure if they would want us to, so I wanted until the week before to ask, since things seem to change so quickly.  The lady I always coordinate with was incredibly nice.  She said a few people had asked if I was bringing the meal, so that made me happy.  They aren’t allowing volunteers inside, but said that as long as we were okay dropping the food off at the door, while wearing masks, they would love to have the meal.  We were more than happy to do it that way.  We now have an uninterrupted streak since 2016, so I was thrilled not to miss a year.

Everything went smoothly with the drop off.  We’re normally able to use a cart they have, but couldn’t this year, so there were a lot of trips back and forth to the car, but nothing was spilled or forgotten.  We ended up talking to a very nice lady in the parking lot.  She was nice, but made me cry.  I’d like to go one year without crying! 

Two older couples that we’re friends with were also staying home for Thanksgiving, so I offered a drop-off/pickup of food for them since I was already cooking and it’s practically impossible to cook Thanksgiving dinner for only two.  One couple came and picked up desserts.  We talked for a few minutes through the glass door, which was strange, but also nice.  The other couple lives just down the street from us, so we dropped off desserts and sides, and they sent some different desserts and sides home with us.  It was a fairly warm day, so we sat out on their patio, six feet apart, in masks, and talked for a while.  Again, it was weird, but nice to see them. 

Like so many people, our Christmas plans look very different this year.  We’re not doing our usual trip to my sister’s.  We talked to her and to Nick’s mom and step-dad and all agreed to forego gifts this year, since we can’t be together, and plan for an insanely huge celebration next year.  Everyone was happy with that idea, so it’s nice that we’re all in agreement.  I imagine it would be very stressful if the people you normally celebrate with are taking a different approach from you.  

We haven’t even put up our Christmas tree this year.  Neither one of us felt especially motivated to on Thanksgiving weekend (when we normally put it up), and then we were sick (NOT COVID, we both had negative tests) for a while after that.  Then it just reached the point of not being worth it to drag everything out for such a short time.  It’s weird not having the tree up, but that’s 2020.  I did put up some wreaths on the doors, and we’ve been listening to Christmas music, so there’s some Christmas spirit here.  

The only Christmas shopping I’ve done has been for my chemo/senior buddies.  Their packages have all been shipped and delivered.   Caroline helped with the wrapping and packaging.  I decided on mostly small things that would fit in a stocking, so I hope they like everything.  We also did a family package for my buddy who’s married and has a young son and a dog (the dog toys were from Duke and the cats to her dog).  I asked Nick’s mom if the family package would be weird, and she said it wouldn’t.  Hopefully they’ll like it.  We included a DVD of Home Alone in it, which the kids next door LOVED, when they were the same age as her son, so we’re hoping his taste is similar.  

Caroline "helping"

I’m still working from home, as it seems a lot of you are.  I’ve worked from home longer than I worked in the office before we shut down.  And it has already been over a year since I started the new job!  I still love it, even if it’s a little weird working from home, so I’m so glad I made the switch last year.  

I think those are the highlights of what I’ve been up to since the last time I posted.  So what about you?  Any home projects?  Are you working from home?  What have you been up to for the past couple of months?  

I’m almost certain I won’t post again before Christmas, so I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas, or a happy holiday.  I hope you’re all safe and well.

The Things That Will Never Be The Same

Duke

This a long post.  It’s one that I’ve wanted to write for a while, but it took me some time to organize my thoughts.  It starts with more of the negative because I like to end with the positive.  I don’t have any pictures that really go with it, so enjoy a random assortment of pet pictures.  Because we can all use more pet pictures in our lives. 

It’s hard to say exactly when COVID-19 took over.  For me, I’m going with March 14, 2020.  That’s when we started canceling things we had planned; a cooking class, hair appointments, dentist appointments, etc.  March 13, 2020, was the last day I worked from my office.  Looking back, it was a normal, but really, really good workweek.  On March 13, 2020, I left work for the day, with my laptop, a few files, and several books.  I knew I’d probably be working from home for a couple of weeks, maybe a little longer.  I never thought I’d still be working from home two months later.  And I certainly never thought my opinion of so many people would change so drastically.  I never thought so many things would never be the same.

I’m not saying that I don’t think things will never go back to how they were pre-COVID.  I have to believe they will, or I would go absolutely insane.  Though, to be honest, I’d be pretty happy if shaking hands went away entirely.  This isn’t the first time in human history that something like this has happened, and this time, we have better medical care and over 100 years worth of developments and improvement in science since the last time the world faced something similar to this. 

Howard

I don’t think things are going to go back to normal any time soon, though.  It takes time to develop and test treatments and vaccines.  It takes time for economies to recover.  It takes time for trauma to heal, and in a lot of ways, I think a lot of people have been traumatized by this.  That kind of healing doesn’t happen overnight.  But it does happen.  I have to believe that.
But I still keep thinking about all of the things that won’t be the same, even when it’s perfectly safe for all of us to be back at work, in restaurants, and in hair salons.  Will we be so used to maintaining distance that we still avoid crowds?  Will we pay more attention the next time a mysterious illness affects another part of the world?  Will we become like our Depression Era great grandparents, saving everything and wasting nothing?  Will we spend more time outside?  Less time in front of screens?  Will the resurgence of interest in learning skills like baking bread, sewing, and basic home repair last? 

Those are the big picture questions, that may well only be answered in the history books.  There’s already a museum project in North Carolina encouraging people to save things like PPE once this is over, to preserve the history for future generations.  They’ll probably be the ones who will get the answers to the bigger questions. 

Mortimer

But what about the smaller, more personal or local changes?  Nick’s mom and I have had various versions of this conversation a few times.  How many friendships will be damaged beyond repair?  Or at least irrevocably altered?  How many people will you never view in quite the same light? 

I can’t help feeling like a lot of things will never be quite the same for me. 

I tend to be a rule follower, and seeing someone as a rule follower, or a rule breaker, has always been important in helping to form my opinion of people.  I didn’t realize just how important until the COVID restrictions went into place.  I’m much angrier than I thought I would be to see people blatantly disregarding social distancing measures.  To be honest, it feels me with a rage I didn’t expect from myself.  I’m sure that’s exacerbated by the fact that Nick and my sister are essential workers, that my parents are high-risk, and that so many of our friends are elderly and high risk. 

Charlie

I’ve unfollowed several people on Facebook because I simply cannot stand to see one more post from them mocking the one-way aisles in grocery stores, complaining more about the closure of businesses than the loss of lives, or posting pictures of large gatherings they’re having or attending.  They’re adults, and I can’t stop them, but I don’t have to have a front row seat to watch them.

There are people I no longer wish to pursue friendships with.  It’s not some dramatic middle school style “we’re not friends anymore,” type of thing.  It’s just that the world is big, life is short, and clearly our values do not align in a way that’s going to lead to a lasting friendship. 

There’s a class I want to take when things are back to normal.  The person who teaches it locally has behaved in a manner that I cannot and will not condone, so now whenever I am able to take the class, I’ll be driving over an hour to take it from someone else. 

There’s a healthcare (not traditional western medicine) facility that I won’t be going back to.  They’ve been open through all of the shutdown, and I fully understand that.  Healthcare is essential, and I believe this particular type of healthcare is very beneficial.  I chose early on to cancel my late March appointment because I knew Nick would still be going to work, and through him, I believe I carry a higher risk to the people I’m around.  I thought I’d be rescheduling once things were back to normal.  But now, after two months of Facebook selfies of the owner hugging people, various posts by the owner that the loss of life doesn’t merit the closures we’ve had, and that it’s good for healthy people to be exposed, I won’t be going back. 

Frankie

I know there are plenty of people who view my stand as overly dramatic.  I’ve been told throughout my life that I see things as too black or white, with no gray area.  In some instances that may be true, but I don’t think this is one of them.  Choosing to endanger someone else’s life because of your own preferences or comfort isn’t a gray area to me.  I see blatantly and willfully disregarding the social distancing measures that are in place the same as I see drunk driving.  There’s a good chance you’re going to hurt or kill an innocent person, and that is unacceptable and inexcusable. 

I know there’s always a chance that I’ll change my mind when things are back to normal, and I’m not in a constant state of panic, but I think it’s doubtful.  I can’t see myself spending my money at and supporting a business when their values are clearly so contrary to mine.  And as far as friendships, I don’t think I’ll ever come to view willfully endangering people you see as somehow less worthy as a trait I want to see in a friend.  There’s the Japanese proverb that says. “When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.”  I’d rather my character be defined by people who are willing to do what is necessary for the greater good. 

Caroline

The flip side of this has been the people who have stepped up in ways I wouldn’t have expected. 

We’ve had texts, phone calls, and offers of various food/supplies from people I wouldn’t necessarily have expected to be the ones to check on us during this.  These are the people I want to pursue deeper friendships with.  They obviously care, and that’s always a good basis for friendship.

And let’s not forget all of the people who gave me buttons when I needed them to make mask adapters.  I still have bags of buttons sitting around the house!  No one offered to sell or barter buttons, they simply figured out a way to share them. 

Tara

There’s the person at work who I thought highly of before, but wouldn’t have pegged as the person to be concerned for everyone’s mental well being, who has gone out of his way to provide resources and create ways to mitigate the loneliness and isolation that comes from working at home.  There’s the coworker who calls at least once a day so I can talk to another person while Nick is at work.  There’s the person at work who helped me track down PPE for my sister when her job couldn’t get it.  These are things that I will never forget.  I am definitely bringing in some cakes whenever we’re back in the office.

There’s the amazingly delicious pie shop kind of near us that has now provided me with the perfect excuse to eat too much pie once things are back to normal.  Technically, they could have stayed open during all of this, but they chose to close when schools closed and restaurants were required to go to take-out only.  There are various programs through the schools here to provide food for needy children, including programs that send food home with them over the weekend and holidays.  Schools closing meant more issues with food insecurity.  So, the pie shop handed out free bagged lunches (PB&J sandwich, an apple, a cookie, and milk) every day, even though they weren’t open for business.  As the community started to get involved, they were able to hand out more food.  That’s a business I want to support.  They filled a need, and provided an outlet for other people to help.  I feel good about spending my money there.  And it’s an added bonus that I’ll get to eat pie in the process. 

Then there are all of the restaurants that have provided food to Nick’s job during this.  A few local restaurants have dropped off food for them, and have provided free meals for first responders.  Some of them don’t have the best parking, or the most convenient hours, but they are absolutely the restaurants we will be going to once things are back to normal.  They’ve demonstrated that they value our essential workers and first responders, just like we do.

Frankie & Howard

I just can’t help thinking that seeing these things, the good and the bad, will forever change and shape how I view people.  There’s the Spanish proverb, “Tell me who your friends are and I’ll tell you who you are.”  I believe that’s true. 

So what about you?  Has your opinion of anyone changed, for good or bad, during all of this?  Are there businesses you will or won’t support going forward?  Do you think we’ll go back to exactly how things were before?

Crocheting For A Cause

This post could just as easily have been titled “Hanging On To My Sanity With Yarn”, but “Crocheting For A Cause” sounded a little nicer.

I’ve come to the realization over the years that I handle practically anything much better if I have a task.  It doesn’t have to be anything terribly important, but I need something to do.   The worse things are the more desperately I need something to do.  I think that’s why I always bring food when someone is sick or has a death in the family. 

A global pandemic involving social distancing isn’t the best time for someone with no medical training, with a job that isn’t really essential to find something to keep busy. 

I attempted making crochet masks, but they’re not the best.  If things get worse and they’re needed I will definitely keep making them, but fabric masks seem to be what most people prefer. 

Last week I saw two posts on Facebook that involved useful crocheting.  The first  was mask adapters.  The post said that healthcare workers are asking for them because the masks are very uncomfortable when worn for extended periods of time.  There’s a crochet group in the upstate of South Carolina that is making them for some of the hospitals and clinics there.  I got an address to mail some to.

I watched this video and tried following the pattern.  I don’t have a stitch marker, and didn’t fully understand how it would be used, so I had to improvise a little.  Mine aren’t pretty, but I think they will work.  I’m mailing some to the group in SC, and we sent some to the local hospice house. 

They're not the prettiest, but hopefully they'll help.

One of my coworkers is married to an E.R. nurse, so I emailed him to see if his wife might want them.  He said her hospital is using them.  We’ve made arrangements for him to pick them up from our front porch tomorrow.  I’m hoping to get some feedback as to how make them more useful.

Another one of my coworkers is married to a respiratory therapist, so I emailed him to see if his wife might want them.  He said she does.  We’re still in the process of working out a handoff.

I started getting low on buttons.  I’ve ordered some, but they’re going to take a week to arrive, so I asked on Facebook.  I’ve been given enough buttons to keep making adapters for a very long time!  One friend gave us a gallon sized Ziploc bag that’s nearly full of buttons.  One of Nick’s coworkers brought a smaller bag of buttons to him yesterday.  Someone else has promised more buttons. 

Coins for scale when people started asking about button size.  

The next post I saw was about using crocheted straps for cloth face masks.  Most of the patterns call for elastic straps, but I’m told that getting elastic has become much like getting hand sanitizer or toilet paper.  You can’t.  

Someone figured out a way to make crochet straps instead of elastic.  I don’t have any of my own pictures of the masks with the crochet straps, and I’m uncomfortable posting someone else’s pictures.  The masks look like the ones in this pattern and this pattern.  Just picture crochet straps instead of ribbon or elastic.

I shared the post on Facebook and asked if anyone was sewing masks and needed straps.   A friend put me in touch with one of her friends who had been on Facebook asking for elastic.  I posted my offer of straps on her page.  One of her friends, Cindy, sent me a message that she was making masks for an assisted living facility and had run out of elastic.  So we decided to collaborate.  I made a batch of straps, using three different sized hooks, to see which one would work best. 

On a side note, the first person who had asked for elastic was given elastic much like I was given buttons. 

The next day we took my first batch of straps and dropped them off on Cindy’s porch.  The same day she was asked by someone at another facility for masks. 

The first batch of straps.

After trying the straps made with different sized hooks, it was determined that the “I” hook makes the best straps.   They’re 21inches long, with a 5 - 6 inch tail on both ends.  Cindy suggested the longer tail since some of the folks in assisted living facilities may have arthritis, and the longer tails would be easier for them to tie.

I crocheted straps for most of the day Friday and some on Saturday morning.  We dropped off the next batch of straps on Cindy’s porch on Saturday afternoon, and picked up a jar of buttons she gave me for the adapters.  

The second, much bigger, batch of straps. 

Yesterday Cindy sent me a text that someone from another facility had asked for masks, so she’s making more.  I had a small batch ready that she picked up from our mailbox.  I’m currently working on more.  Cindy says she’ll keep sewing the masks as long as people keep asking for them.  I’ll keep making the straps as long as someone can use them for masks. 

It’s hard to explain, but I feel so much better having something even slightly useful to do.  It hasn’t really changed much for me.  I’m still working from home during the day, and watching a lot of TV in the evening.  Now I’m just crocheting straps or adapters while I watch TV, but it makes me feel better.  

It was also nice to see so many people working together.  There have been so many examples of people behaving selfishly, whether it’s price gouging, hoarding food/supplies, or doing things to put the most vulnerable at risk.  It can make the world seem like a terrible place.  But then there are times when people reach out to help.  I know it’s small in the grand scheme of things, but it’s nice to see that someone can ask for something like fabric, elastic, or buttons to make things to try to help and be inundated with people providing those supplies.   

So what about you?  Have you seen examples of people working together lately?  Do you need a task to stay sane when things are bad?  

Chili - With A Few Modifications For Social Distancing/Quarantine

We’ve had colder weather this week than we did last week.  Fortunately, it hasn’t dropped down to freezing, so all of the blooming flowers and bushes are doing just fine.  It has, however, been cold enough to warrant making some soups and general comfort foods.

Chili is one of Nick’s absolute favorite foods, so it seemed like a good time to make a batch of chili. This recipe is based mostly on my usual recipe, which you can find here.  On a side note, I posted the original recipe over six years ago.  It’s hard to believe I’ve been blogging that long.  Some of you have been visiting that entire time, or very close to it.  Thank you to all of you who visit and comment.  I enjoy your online company.

Anyway, back to the recipe. 

The biggest modification I made to this recipe was with the meat.  I’m not sure about where you are, but meat seems to be in very short supply here.  We’re in the western part of the state, and my sister is in kind of the middle of the state, and she said it’s the same there.  We have a chest freezer, and I tend to shop sales and stock up anyway, so we were actually in pretty good shape going into this, without panic buying.  However, it does seem prudent to try and stretch things a bit more now.  It seems like every time a new restriction goes into place there’s another round of panic buying, and I just don’t think we’ve reached the height of our social distancing yet.  So, again, I think it’s prudent to go ahead and get a little creative now instead of being forced to get super creative later.

We had three leftover grilled hamburgers in the freezer, so I decided to use them instead of a package of ground beef.

I defrosted them and chopped them up into very small pieces, and used them in place of the usual ground beef.

I browned the onion (half a yellow onion and half a red onion that were in the fridge leftover from other meals) and pepper (from the freezer) in a small amount of avocado oil.  We happen to have a large bottle of avocado oil at the moment, so that’s why I chose it.  I really think whatever your usual oil of choice is will be perfectly fine. 

I added everything to the Crock Pot, and just stirred in the taco seasoning, chili powder, and cumin since they weren’t cooked with the meat.  I left it on low, and it was ready for dinner.

We ate it over macaroni noodles and topped it with shredded cheese and sour cream.

It was delicious!   This turned out to be a very good recipe modification.  The grilled meat really added a depth of flavor to the chili.  Nick said it was the best chili he has ever had.  I think I may try to keep some grilled hamburgers in the freezer for chili in the future. 

I highly recommend giving this a try if you happen to have any grilled hamburgers on hand.

So what about you?  Do you enjoy chili?  Are you modifying any recipes due to lack of availability of certain items?